The Proverbs 31 Woman

The Proverbs 31 woman says something encouraging to all women.  She is very proactive.  She is not a reactive victim.  I think that is interesting that the very first thing that is mentioned about her is not about what she is doing with her hands, but with how she is in her relationship with her husband.  He safely trusts her to be a good steward of all that is theirs.  He trusts her to do him good.   

Compare this to the Luke 12:42: Who then is that faithful and wise steward, when his lord shall make ruler over his household, to give them their portion of meat in due season?   

Stewardship is a relationship issue.  Before it engages our doing, it engages our perception of "husband" or "Lord."  It is an honor to be trusted with the position and responsibility.  It is about serving and managing all that He has placed before you.  We so often want people and position to serve us.  I call this the "fairy tale" syndrome.  We want the knight and shining armor to sweep us away to the castle where we are served and catered to.  That is not what God has called us to. 

The lie in all this may be that we see only our limitations...some people even take comfort in those limitations because they feel excused by them.  Everyone else does it better.  I cannot do it as good as others.  I do not have what I need to do it.   

And so, if you cannot be validated by the works of your own hand, you will find value in the works of others...what they give you or do for you.  It a second-hand / counterfeit value.  It is a prostituting of our soul.   Seeking to be valuable in some way, we read it as "I am of value" because others give or do for me.

Not only does the virtuous woman have a correct perception of relationship to husband, she willing works with her hands and head.  She can conduct business.  She gets up early and stays up late.  She works with her hands in her own "garden."  Garden is symbolic of whatever the Lord has called us to do.  She knows her work is good.  She KNOWS her work is good...self-esteem, self-respect.  She serves the poor and needy...she is community oriented.  She is dressing her family in beautiful clothes, and she dresses herself with beauty.  This is because she knows who SHE is.  It is another way her husband safely trusts in her.  She is wise and kind.  This is other centered, not self-centered. 

When we first have a relationship that is based on truth...I am a steward of all that God has placed in my hands...I am trusted...we have a correct perception of the other details, too.  This mirrors: seek ye first the kingdom of God and all the other things will be taken care of. 

A main gift in this lesson is this:  If I know who I am (daughter of God, wife of the Lord of the manor), I understand that I am in a relationship of equals like the trinity.  They are one with three different roles.  They are functioning in mutual submission to one another.   

For me, the Proverbs 31 woman is full of truth and encouragement.  Her OWN works praise her in the gates.  This is delightful.  It isn't the works of others for her that gives her validation.  It is her works.  The community takes note of her because she is other centered.  That is, after all, what love means.   

Here is to growing and becoming all that we can be...the Proverbs 31 woman.  May we each be praised in the gates of our sphere of influence because we correctly perceive that we are serving the Lord in mutual submission.  Praise God!