Trusting and Contentment

Lack of contentment causes us to kick into the “I will ascend” mode.  I think it takes many forms.

I will ascend by escape:  I taught a class one time which was about the Exodus.  A point that I made which offended some was that desire for Exodus may come from wanting to escape something instead of wanting to move on to embrace the journey and the developing relationships…like discovering God in the wilderness journey.  Those that wanted escape from Egypt also wanted escape in the wilderness.  They regretted leaving Egypt and even being in the wilderness.   The motivations for escape are invested in avoidance, and the resulting anger/rage that can develop when people, places, and things are not what we want serve to harden the heart. 

I will ascend by going somewhere else: I will ascend can be manifested in other ways of shutting out the world.  Like kids who take their toys to another sandbox.  When our programming demands that we have our way and others be what we want/need, the other sandbox always looks like it has more potential.  I will just start over.  Maybe the kids that join me will be better.  I remember a time when I kept changing jobs because they were just awful.  Finally, I discovered that it was not about the jobs.  It was about me.  I had outgrown that particular job environment.  I kept changing jobs in the same job arena and expecting different results.  The motivation was escape of a “bad” job.  I was refusing to grow and assume responsibility for creating / embracing a different path.  I did not want to change.  I wanted those jobs and the people of those jobs to change.  These situations have the potential of feeling like rejection, and we are resistant to feel what all that means to us. 

I will ascend by do/being more:  This world is about having more, being more, and doing more.  We are programmed for discontent at an early age often confusing activity with productivity and busyness with contentment.  Achievement may be the politically correct way of being OK about being discontented.  It may be another way of hiding, running away, etc.  This energy of discontent leaves us void and empty on the inside.  When I have this, I will be happy.  When I accomplish this, my life will be great.  When I do this, it will be enough.  Achievement from the place of discontent is just a check on the to-do list.  Achievement from the place of joy, adventure, and contentment is a whole different thing.  The difference comes from the motivation, and that is a soul matter.

Egypt versus the promised land…via the wilderness journey.  I am not suggesting that we need to be content with Egypt.  We need to be content with ourselves and whatever our path is for the moment.  In all things be content.  That is about an internal situation.  It is bigger than where we are or what we are doing.  It is a contentment that helps us become an observer and a student in the University of Unlearning which is the wilderness journey.  This journey embraces that which is unfamiliar and uncomfortable as instructors.  These truth encounters will be places of freedom.  Some of us have a belief system that says we do not deserve to be content or satisfied.  It would mean that we might not have to work as hard…and life is about working hard!  We are victimized by our belief system.  Growing up we often learn that we get what we “deserve.”  The smart kids get A’s.  There is always a Winner and the rest of us are losers.  These messages propel us into a works/achievement mentality.  We do not recognize that at its core is the lie “you must ascend” in order to be as good as, good enough, the same as, and better than. 

This writing is embracing much, and I have no grand illusions that I am in any way doing this topic justice with these few remarks.  At best, I can hope that we will look at our journey in the wilderness with more understanding and even excitement rather than through the lens of the victim.  Rather than the I will ascend compulsion, Lord, help us understand the I must decrease and You must increase path.  It is not a path of less, it is the ultimate path of more.  Praise God!